We are collages

The saddest thing anyone ever said to me was: “I’m not the person you think I am.” Sad because I chose not to hear it. Years later I finally understand. What is said and what is heard are often entirely different. Our desires colour what is received, shaping and shading it. None of us are the people others see us as or want us to be. Or even the people we believe ourselves to be. We are collages. Collections and layers.

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2 thoughts on “We are collages

  1. When I was 14, my Media Studies teacher (yes, Media Studies) set us a project entitled ‘How I see myself. How I think others see me.’ It was a powerful exercise for quite a few people I think, and definitely for me. Your post made me think of it. You’re right, of course, we are collages, and all the more beautiful for the layers. These days I find the record collection of someone who’s been into music for a long time a good metaphor for a person: people look at the collection and they look for common ground; they may look for histories, contradictions, moments in time. I’m always drawn to the little pop section of a predominantly electronic music collection: you can learn a lot about a person from that. Oh, and yes, I know the experience of ‘I’m not the person you think I am’. And the choosing not to hear it bit.

  2. “they look for common ground; they may look for histories, contradictions, moments in time”

    I hear that Stef.

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